Article by Capt. Mark Sampson
As every fisherman knows, catching fish doesn’t happen on every trip. In fact, I think that for a lot of folks “not” catching fish is a much more common occurrence. So I got to thinking that maybe I’m missing a great opportunity to tap into an overlooked segment of the outdoor writing market by directing my efforts on those fishermen who are tired of always reading about how to “catch fish” and instead write about how “not to catch fish” because that’s a topic that all fishermen should be able to relate to!
I’m not referring to the days when anglers do everything right, but Mother Nature just doesn’t send any hungry fish their way. Oh no, that’s too easy! On days like that, anglers don’t have to try not to catch fish, it just happens. Or should I say it just “doesn’t happen,” so anglers shouldn’t try to take credit for it. “How to not catch fish” is about when the actions of anglers specifically prevent them from catching fish. It’s not that the fish aren’t biting, it’s that the fishermen can’t connect when they have a chance to.
For example; one of the best ways not to catch fish is to have no bait on the boat, which of course is a no-brainer and a situation no fisherman would allow themselves to be in. But it does happen. In fact, I recall it happening to a team fishing in the White Marlin Open a number of years ago. In preparation for the first day of fishing the gang spent all afternoon at one of the fellow’s home rigging a cooler full of ballyhoo, mullet, squid and mackerel. The problem was, the next morning when they when to put their lines out in the Washington Canyon, they realized their cooler of baits was still sitting on the team member’s back deck! In another tournament a team also rigged all their baits before the first fishing day but forgot to put ice in the bait cooler. The next day the weather was hot and sunny but too rough to fish, so the cooler sat in the sun and baked. Evidently the team never opened the cooler lid until they were out on the fishing grounds two days later. I might be wrong but I don’t think billfish care too much for “hot” pink squid or baked ballyhoo!
Another way to not catch fish is to have no bait on your hook, a technique which is actually pretty easy to learn and one that most of us have practiced more than once throughout our fishing careers. I could ramble on about how to put a hook in a bait in such a way that it will easily tear off at the slightest nibble or by water pressure from a strong current or fast retrieve, but the easiest way to fish with no bait is simply to not check the bait regularly. The heck with bringing the bait up just to see that it’s still intact, just let it go, fish every bait a long, long time. Leave it in the water long enough that the crabs, small bluefish, sharks, or squid can eat it right off the hook. Heck, leave it in there long enough that the snails and sea-slugs can find it and whittle it down to nothing! The next best thing to fishing with no bait is fishing with bait that’s all clumped up with seaweed. Unfortunately, seaweed is just not predictable enough that anglers can always count on it being there to deter bites.
I know anglers who have avoided catching fish by leaving the dock without their rods, tackle box, flies, net, gaff, and just about any other essential piece of fish catching equipment imaginable. On a similar note I once had a group of six anglers come out fishing with me who left their food and drink cooler on the dock. It was a long hot day for those fellows who were seriously considering having a meal of sushi before it was all over.
A lot of fishermen have become pretty good at not catching fish by fishing where there are no fish. How many times I’ve watched anglers on the shore or in a boat casting right up onto a sandbar where it’s only inches deep. If I didn’t know that they were actually trying not to catch fish I’d be duped into believing that they just didn’t know how shallow it was.
Anyone can get a tangled line but it takes a pro at not catching fish to get a whopper of a tangle just as a school of fish pops up within casting range. If really done correctly an angler can make it look to their fishing partners like the tangle resulted from fumbling around with the rod and reel in efforts to fire off a quick cast in order to actually “catch” a fish. A good tangle should take so long to straighten out that there is no chance of getting a line in the water before all evidence of the passing school has vanished.
I could go on and on about ways not to catch fish, but I’m thinking that most anglers already have their own list of methods to ensure that they don’t have to clean fish or the fish box at the end of the day. Besides, I’m thinking now that this could be good book material, something like “101 Ways Not To Catch Fish” or “How To Fish and NOT Come Home Smelling Like One.” Anyway, I wish everyone a good week of fishing whether you're successful at catching - or not! §
